Joe Berkowitz @joeberkowitz@otters.at

There’s a scene in Mad Men when a lady tells Don Draper “you like sex, I can tell” immediately after they have sex.

Some people process near-death experiences differently.

The theme of every theme park is: waiting in lines.

If your pizza place is called DEATH TO THE FAKE PIZZA, it's a no-Yelp situation, I am going.

Found this candy in Mexico City called "Skwinkles"-- already incredible--and it consists of gummy spaghetti with tamarind spaghetti sauce.

I send followup texts correcting my own typos not because I don't think you understood what I meant but because I need you to understand I am aware of the typo.

[whispering to my date an hour and ten minutes into Avatar 2] That’s the way of the water.

Terrified to find out whether/how much the boomers in my life are into Tulsa King.

What's better than when someone reminds you to do something and you've ALREADY DONE IT.

A very real line I definitely did not remember being in this movie.

Feeling personally attacked by this family treat bowl.

Was stunningly late into my teens when I realized it wasn't called the "windshield" factor.

played Taboo last night for the first time in forever and it's adorable that they didn't include DRUGS on this card.

Congrats to anyone who has ever wrapped a present without it looking super janky. You are a hero and a legend.

"What if there was a way to make being sober sound even less fun?" --whoever came up with teetotaler

My mother in law only wants to watch disaster movies, doesn't care how bad they are. She's seen Geostorm at least twice.

Are you already eating all day long like it’s the end of the world or are you weird.

I will never understand how the stock market works.

Wish I could bottle the hopefulness in my father-in-law's eyes just now when he tried to sell everyone on watching the new season of Jack Ryan as a family.